Fastest. Six months. Ever.

In 5 days, my baby will be six months old. That's like half a year! It's been the fastest six months probably of my entire life. The days pass so quickly and sometimes I look back at bedtime and ask myself "what did I do today?" Especially on those days when the laundry doesn't get folded, or the kitchen tidied up... What did I actually accomplish today?

Well, over the past six months I've brought a new person into the world.  I've managed to keep that person alive for half a year! Along with Mike, I've watched him grow and change and start to become an individual. I've seen him smile for the first time, heard his laugh. I've wiped his tears, his face, his bum and everything in between. I've been peed on and puked on (countless times) thankfully not pooped on yet. I've seen the look of pride on his face when he rolled over for the first time, or when he sat up and reached for a toy. I've laughed with him, cried with him and occasionally screamed with him.

Yes, my house is often a bit messy; we're "clutter-bugs". But I know that my son feels loved. He knows that if he cries, I'll be there. He will know that I will be willing to play, sing, laugh, cry, teach and learn with him. He's changing every day and I want to be there to appreciate it. I can't imagine anything more important in this world!

Mommy loves you Thom!

The Guilt Complex

I don't know if it has something to do with being an oldest child, or being raised by a single-parent, or if I'm just genetically predisposed, but I have a serious problem with guilt. And it seems to have increased ten-fold since becoming a Mom. I know I'm supposed to "trust my instincts", but I'm constantly second-guessing myself. I know that I am trying to do right by my son, but isn't that what most parents are trying to do?

Take for example the issue of starting him on solids. The "experts" say to wait until the baby is 6 months old. Okay. My Mom and my Mother-in-law tell me it'll help him sleep through the night, "breastfed babies are always hungry", etc.

But I know that I know my kid. And so I wait. And people continue to ask, and poke and mention and advise... "Haven't you given that boy any REAL food yet?"

So I get exasperated, and set an arbitrary start date. Which in our case was after Christmas. And then it got pushed back a little until New Year's. Okay, fine. I mostly set the date to give people an answer when they asked.

So we started baby "cereal" on New Year's Eve. Not such a fan at first, but today is day 4 and he pretty much loves it. And yet at the same time, I'm worrying about starting him "too soon". Especially with all the food allergies and intolerances between Mike and I. But I know he is ready, shouldn't that be enough?

I have so many guilt riddled experiences to look forward to over the course of his life...

My First Adventure

Thomas Michael Shantz came into the world (3 days late) on July 17, 2011. With the sounds of screaming (his), a squishy looking pink person changed my life forever.

I won't go into the details of labour... mostly because I've repressed them already. Let me just say that it was an "all natural" hospital birth. Yes, I'm crazy. Yes, I'd do it again.

The days went by in a blur. How the time flies I don't understand!

Now here we are, almost six months later and we're learning so much together as a family. I'm having the best time with Thom (also known as Tomtom, Tommy T, the "Little Man", Sweet Pea and a bunch of other terms of endearment) we giggle and laugh together and also with Daddy. Sure, we have our moments, when I just want him to be quiet so I can sleep for 10 more minutes, or when he's teething and wakes up screaming every hour all night long... but in general he's a happy, content, adorable baby boy and I love him to bits.

We started "solids" earlier this week, and each time he eats, he seems to enjoy himself more and more! It's the newest part of our adventure and it's hilarious. We are learning and growing together, and I love it!